For those of you who don’t know, last Wednesday I made quite possibly the largest transition of my life. After living in the United Kingdom for 9 months, I moved back home to South Carolina. Not only has jet-lag been my constant companion, but also this lingering insecurity of where my life is going now?
When I was in Nottingham, I was a student and a church volunteer. I had a role. I had a duty. Now as I sit at home, the enemy pelts my minds with thoughts of inferiority and confusion. Who am I? What am I doing? Where is my purpose?
I know the Lord had called me back, but that doesn’t mean that the enemy of our souls can’t still drop subtle doubts and uncertainties into our hearts.
In 1 Samuel 19, we find David returning to Jerusalem after the death of his son, Absalom. Now Absalom had been fueling an insurrection against King David and had just been killed by one of David’s men. David, in fear of his son, had fled the city where he reigned and returned to the wilderness. I can imagine David thinking, “I thought this part of my life was over. This running season was supposed to have ended with Saul. Now here I am once again, and this time fleeing from my own flesh and blood.”
In verse 21 one of David’s men asks if Shimei, a man who had cursed him when he and his family had fled, should be put to death because of his sin. David responds in verse 22, “What does this have to do with you, you sons of Zeruiah? What right do you have to interfere? Should anyone be put to death in Israel today? Don’t I know that today I am king over Israel?”
People had cursed him. Many of his friends had turned against him. His throne was snatched from under him. His family was in danger. His son was seeking his life. His whole world had been turned upside down, and yet David did not need to act callously to be confident of who he was.
You see, God had given him a spirit of anointing, a power to lead, a hand to guide, a head for a crown. David didn’t need every last circumstance to point to his earthly kingship for his assurance anymore. He knew what God had called him to, and there was no need for any further affirmation. David was secure in who he was and what God had created him to do.
Sometimes our circumstances change and we can feel like our identity is muffled by noise and chaos. Our assurance in what we heard God tell us seeps through the cracks of doubt erecting throughout our minds. We fear the future, we grasp at straws, we lose faith in our God.
But today I am speaking life instead of death, hope instead of fear. We do not serve a god made of clay or gold but a living God of endless might and matchless power. He is great and greatly to be praised. He has promised to never leave us nor forsake us. He is a good God. When we begin to say who God is, we remember who we are!
Stop entertaining the devil and his vicious lies. He wants to take you out of the game, but we must constantly remind him that he has no power over us. We are of the Great Shepherd’s flock and the voice of a stranger and deceiver we do NOT follow.